Just kidding. Things are not better. I am tired of not having any friends and wish I never had to socialize with anyone ever so I wouldn't notice. This sucks. Terrible hard to deal with things are supposed to pass. It has been 20 years and it's probably not going anywhere. I am tired of this. I don't know how I am supposed to make it an entire lifetime being treated like I am an alien unworthy of friendship or even kindness. I don't want to be around people anymore if that is how they are going to make me feel. But I don't have a choice. It's hard to look at an aspect of your life, probably any aspect really, at 20 years old and think, "this is as good as it's going to get."

If this is as good as it gets I don't want "it."